The Illusion of Success & Failure: Letting the Mission & Vision Guide You
Dropping Labels & Stepping Into A Great Sense Of Purpose
The Societal Trap of Success
I’m often approached by individuals who, from the outside, seem to have achieved great levels of success, yet they still feel something is missing. Don’t buy into the illusion of success or failure. Instead, let your vision guide you toward a greater sense of meaning and purpose.
Most people chase an idealism of how life should be, but struggle to find fulfillment. We create fantasies about how things are meant to look, how long they should last, and what they should mean. When we hold hard lines and unrealistic expectations, we set ourselves up for disappointment. The feeling of emptiness and lack of meaning seeps into life as feedback, revealing the assumptions behind the mental noise. Our role is to interpret and self-correct, and surround ourselves with individuals and teams that allow the maximization of human endeavors toward greater levels of experience and self-realization.
"Do not be too timid and squeamish about your actions. All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make, the better." — Ralph Waldo Emerson
Success: A Misleading Concept
Be wary of the word success and those who overuse it. It’s a misnomer. It implies you’ve arrived, but where, exactly? This mindset can leave you feeling stagnant, without goals, objectives, or a greater sense of purpose.
When I hear individuals speak of their success, they’re often at a turning point—either on their way down or heading toward retirement. The moment you perceive yourself as successful, you risk shifting your focus to lower-priority activities. You begin to de-purpose your life, caught in the pride before the fall.
Anecdotally, I’ve seen entrepreneurs sell their companies, executives get promoted and then struggle to find their next meaningful pursuit. Even after having the house on a hill, the cars, vacations, even adding new members to the family. Their once-driven days are replaced with comfort, but also with an ever growing and undiagnosed void, until they find a new mission to pursue. We’re designed to be useful and provide value to those around us. Reflect on what quantifiable cap could stop you from living in your values and by your priorities? What could stop you from doing what you're innately designed to do?
The Nature of Transformation
The universe constantly recycles itself; nothing is ever gained or lost, only transformed. Water follows the path of least resistance, finding its most efficient route. Life force and energy work the same way.
Either you bring greater order, structure, and mission into your life, or you’ll attract humbling circumstances that bring entropy and decay. You’ll see it in your health, finances, mental state, social interactions, and even through life’s unexpected tragedies.
Buying into the label of success is like consuming an opium sold to the masses. These labels, success and failure, are amygdala-driven responses, chasing short-term dopamine hits. They distort reality, creating unnecessary frustrations.
"It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent, but the one most responsive to change." — Charles Darwin
True wisdom comes from embracing the feedback you're already receiving, integrating the lessons, and using them as stepping stones for your next iteration. Stagnation is always an option when something feels missing, but inaction or action will cost you either way. A solution is inevitable—whether you act or let inertia take over.
Solution comes from Sol-ution: “Sol” representing the sun, light waves, and energy, and “ution” signifying meaningful action. The journey ahead will bring both pleasure and pain equally (+/-).
For instance, I don’t remove anyone’s pain or suffering; I transmute it. I move it from the head (brain noise) to the ass (financially in the wallet). I turn frustration, self-judgment, and resentment into purpose, gratitude, and an understanding of the greater order in their lives. This process opens the heart, mind, and executive center, allowing you to serve the world in a more meaningful way.
You’re going to have stress either way: distress (uninspiring challenges) or yu-stress (inspiring challenges). You’ll never escape stress, but the premise of a purpose-built life is about filling your life with inspiring challenges you design, rather than being burdened by duties imposed on you.
You’ll have to piss someone off to live the life you’re destined to live. The choice is: will it be your life, or someone else’s? Everyone is already injecting their values onto you, will you discover and align yourself with the values you're truly wanting and guiding to fulfill?
Failure: A Pathway to Mastery
Failure isn’t an endpoint, it’s a revelation of missing information. It highlights the gaps in knowledge and serves as a guide to iterate and refine. Those who operate from their executive center, focused on their highest priorities, approach failure with resilience and objectivity.
Failure allows you to repurpose and reprioritize. It turns obstacles into milestones, not roadblocks. It shifts your perspective from seeing challenges as barriers to recognizing them as essential steps on your journey. Success and failure are two sides of the same coin; both serve as feedback loops to refine your path.
Unfortunately, many people are held back by societal indoctrinations, external expectations, and imposed obligations from parents, teachers, religions, and cultural authorities. These influences often steer them away from what is most deeply meaningful and fulfilling.
"What we fear doing most is usually what we most need to do." — Tim Ferriss
Facing some of the past internal challenges, those we’ve buried for years, is part of that process. Many of us have been seeking more quality answers in life, but the questions we open up can lead to greater interpretation, self-reflection, and understanding of why we’re in certain situations and not feeling satisfied. What worked yesterday won’t work today, and what got us here won’t get us where we want to be. Uncovering what we optimized for until this point is foundational, as an open heart and mind allow for not only gratitude but an opportunity to delve deeper into what the heart desires. Many of us have obligations and responsibilities that rely on us beyond what others can imagine. The pressures come from multiple directions, but the realizations that come from this level of internal investigation allow you to see the perfection of the past, so you can move forward without fears, anxieties, and uncertainties, stepping back into the natural curiosity and desire that got you to this point.
Living a Purpose-Built Life
The way forward lies in expanding your vision, realigning with your mission, and living with purpose. Prioritizing your days around what holds true meaning for you creates a profound sense of fulfillment. This process is a journey from voids to values, transforming what’s missing into a mission that revitalizes and sustains you far beyond the fleeting highs of external validation.
Often, in hindsight, not getting what you wanted at the time you wanted it turns out to be the greatest blessing. It breaks the addictive cycle of idealism and fantasy, replacing it with wisdom. Many realize, sometimes decades later, that what once seemed like chaos was actually a carefully orchestrated opportunity for growth.
But there is a better way, one that doesn’t require hindsight and lost years. You don’t have to wait for life to pass you by to see the lessons. You can proactively decode feedback, integrate wisdom, and move forward with clarity and intention.
"The good life is one inspired by love and guided by knowledge." — Bertrand Russell
Take Action: Step Into Your Purpose
Let others live by the illusion of success and failure. Break through the baggage holding you back. Recognize that the challenges of your past, and the ones you face now, are not obstacles but designed catalysts for your evolution.
The universe, your life, and every business, family, country, and organization operate under this same principle. Downtimes aren’t punishments; they are invitations to grow and evolve. Use them wisely, so you can emerge stronger, ready to serve, create value, and provide transformation.
Your greatest asset is your connection with yourself and your vision. Don’t lose sight of it. And don’t act as if you have a thousand years to live. Maximize your potential now.
No external success will ever compare to the internal alignment of living your purpose. Wisdom comes from looking back at your decisions, understanding what needs they met, and refining your approach with greater awareness. There is far more intelligence within you than any external authority can offer.
My role is to ask the right questions so you can live a quality, meaningful, and fulfilling life.
Your partner in a purpose-built life and business,
Amar
